As Idol's 10th season begins tonight, the question undoubtedly on most people's minds is how in the world is the show going to survive without its venerable bad guy Simon Cowell?
But what I want to know is "why would it want to?"
If the first day of auditions is any indication of what this season holds for us, I'm worried. Very worried. I'm afraid the need for the judges (newcomers Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler along with veteran Randy "don't call me Tito" Jackson) to "play nice" and "get along," is going to stand in the way of reason when it comes to saying no to some of the more marginal talents. In fact, J-Lo confessed (less than 30 minutes in after a very tone-def Madonna impressionist nearly broke her heart)that she "doesn't like to say no" and isn't too fond of the judging process. Oh Lord help us.
But Jenny from the Block's bleeding heart pales in comparison to Steven Tyler's Paula-esque, over-the-top praise for mediocre performances.
And I don't know what to think of the extremely (and I am not a prude) inappropriate comments during the umm ample Tiffany's audition. I'd like to say she earned her ticket to Hollywood with her large vocals but I think there might have been a few other large things at play.
Of course it doesn't hurt to tear up talking about how the movie Selina inspired you to sing.
New drinking game: Take a shot every time someone says "I love you Jennifer!" You won't make it through the show before you pass out drunk.